he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
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