I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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