playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
it glows. i had to have it.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
