it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
you made out with another girl for some wings
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize
