'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
