i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Randomize
