id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Randomize
