And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Randomize