I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
now i know why i became what i already was.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Randomize
