My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize