so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize