This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
