Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
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