we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
