it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
