Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
