Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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