Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
