Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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