YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
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