Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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