also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
