Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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