We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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