are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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