Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
