Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Randomize
