I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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