just come out here and I will go home with you...
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
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