If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
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