people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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