I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
