We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
I look excited, but its just a facade.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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