he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
