I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
The ass gains better be worth it
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