Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
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