HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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