just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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