i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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