i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
