Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize