He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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