eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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