no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
