Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize
