are you so shy because you have an std?
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Randomize
