i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize