Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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