If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize
