If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
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