I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Randomize
